April 2, 2011
Modern Day "I Love Lucy"!
1. Argue about petty and trivial matters
Usually my blog is about sweet and random ramblings of my life and I try not to use this form of therapy to complain or rant but I am sort of at a place where I need to vent. I know I am not the only partner in a marriage going through tough times....nobody has the "perfect" marriage and you will drive yourself insane trying to. Lately it seems that Mike and I "bicker" about everything and it's really so petty that it's stupid and I am about sick of it. I would never leave my husband and vice versa; we love each other passionately but lately we can't seem to get on the same page with things --- it's almost like we are speaking two different languages. We could seriously
argue bicker about the way one of us drinks water right now...and believe me, he *hates* how I drink a bottle of water! He thinks that I drink it entirely too fast and tells me it's not good for me? I don't know if there is any truth in that or if it's a pet peeve of his. Either way, we have bickered about it. I look at us and it's like episodes from the "I love Lucy" show! Our bickering is nothing big, just little things here and there. I am Lucy always doing something that Ricky isn't going to like or gets annoyed with.
We are the modern day "Lucy & Ricky".
Arguing and bickering seem to be the same thing according to good 'ol Webster but not in my dictionary. Bickering isn't as intense but I do think it's more aggravating than a full blown argument. With an argument you have a "fight" (non-physical), talk it out and move on. Bickering you go round and round and round for months on end about stupid, petty things that really do NOT matter in the grand scheme of things. However, you waste more time and energy on bickering than you do having a fight/argument.
I think the root of our bickering is not having the chance to get away with each other for a weekend without the kids, house responsibilities, work, etc....in other words we need a VACATION! Stat. We have not been anywhere together alone since our anniversary last year(Jan 2010) and it's been a long year since that getaway! We had a major move and had other major stressful events happen and we kind of put off our yearly vacation with one another because something "always came up". That is something (if I can help it) that we will never.ever.ever do again! Those two days away are like heaven and it takes you both back to a carefree time where you know why you fell in love in the first place. It's something that couples MUST make time for because your soul, relationship and happiness really does need and depend it.
My parents used to take several "adult only" vacations a year and I would be left at my grandparents house for a long weekend. I hated it growing up because I felt like I was missing all of the fun. I thought that they were horrible parents for always going away without me and I swore I would never do that to my kids. However, now that I have children of my own I know why the did it and why they needed that time together without me. It just took me a very long time to grasp it but I get it now and I do feel it's a necessity in a marriage.
Mike and I are meant for one another. Nobody could love me as much as he does and I don't think he could find someone that loves him more than I do. I think we are just in this funk because we need some "us" time. We need time to look past "Mommy & Daddy" orders from Brody, the typical teenage stuff we get from Victoria, the daily life in the house...we just need a change of pace and scenery for a couple of days. We have a "date night" once a week but we need a "date vacation" soon. Real soon.
I want to stop bickering with my husband and I know he wants the same. We are better than this, our marriage is better than this and we both deserve it. Life is too short to worry about this crap and fuss over it. We are both completely stubborn and hard headed so one of us always wants to be right and annoys the other one. It's completely S.T.U.P.I.D and ignorant for both of us to do and I am putting my foot down and raising my white flag. I give up!!! I surrender. Please stop the bickering!!!
I do feel better after typing my very personal stuff out there but I know I am not alone. Maybe I am just the one who isn't afraid to show my blog followers that I am a real person with real problems. If I didn't have some type of problem I would be concerned....that's not real life. So, starting tonight I am going to stop bickering over the stupid crap. I am going to try to be more understanding when it comes to my husbands choices and wants with things as I hope he can meet me in the middle and do the same. If not, we will both be seeing a Gastro Doctor for ulcers because we are going to give one another one if we haven't already!!!
At the end of the day I love my husband.